Warning: this post is by the Angry Woman living in this pushover’s head.
This woman’s head I live in is so polite it’s PATHETIC! She is such a bleepity bleep pushover, makes me sick. I should have been in some interesting head like Charlie Sheen’s or Lindsay Lohan’s. But sometimes I manage to get out and when I do….it is so bleeping epic. Brings tears of joy to my eyes.
One day she is in the mall with her friend, just window shopping. Who the bleep goes just window shopping? Buy me something bleep it! Spend husband’s money, HAVE FUN! But does she listen. No. Then as she is trying to ignore me screaming in her head this lady walks right into her. She turns and holds her to make sure the lady doesn’t fall, spouting “So sorry”s and “are you alright”s as if she ran over her foot with a bleeping bulldozer or something. What does this lady say to her?
“Oh you bleeping ignorant people!” She screams at her. Talk about bleepity bleep bleep bad breath.
And what does she do? “I said I’m sorry…” and she just stares as this racist bleep continues to insult her. Then she walks away.
“Bleepity bleep!” I scream at her. “You go back and put that bleep in her place, she can’t say things like that! It’s 2013!”
“Maybe she was having a bad day.” She says to me.
“Let me out! I’ll take care of that bleepity bleeping bleep and her bad day!” I say to her.
“No. And stop using foul language.” She says.
Just shoot me.